J K Rowling Sucks

If you haven’t read Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince and/or you don’t want to know the really big plot spoiler I will reveal in my rant, do not click on the link to continue reading.

I’m serious: You will be reading about THE REALLY BIG THING THAT HAPPENS AT THE END OF THE BOOK if you read any further.

Are you sure you wanna?

TURN BACK NOW IF YOU HAVE ANY HESITATION.

Are you sure?

IT’S STILL NOT TOO LATE TO TURN BACK. BUT IF YOU CONTINUE READING I WON’T BE HELD RESPONSIBLE.

Alright then. What’s the password?

Heh. Jes’ kiddin’. Rant now ensues . . .

Dumbledore?! For pity’s sake! Dumbledore?! C’mon, give me a Snape, heck I’d’ve taken a Ginny, or, *gulp*, even a Ron. But not Dumbledore.

Oh, sure, I know. When you have a young or inexperienced protagonist who is being guided by a nearly omniscient or omnipotent mentor, you’ve got to kill off or severely incapacitate the mentor for the protagonist to grow into the full hero the narrative (and the readers) demand.

But Dumbledore . . . *sigh*

The book as a whole lacked that sort of action-and-riddle-driven plot that all of the previous books have been known for. And I’m not sure I think Harry’s lessons with Dumbledore provided the most effective way for us to get the backstory. ‘Course, that being said, it was always difficult to put the book down and attend to my real life duties.

But the writing was much better, much tighter. There seemed to be not a wasted paragraph in this one. All of the side stories provided the appropriate comic relief or pause prior to rebuilding the tension. I must say, I was very pleased to see Ron and Hermione get together. And we all knew it would be Ginny and Harry; that’s been obvious for the last few books. Snape’s killing of Dumbledore was a complete surprise, which shows how well Ms. Rowling has written his character. But there was just enough foreshadowing from the very beginning (Dumbledore’s dead hand, anyone?) so that last night, with about a third of the book to go, I looked at my wife and said, “She’s going to kill off Dumbledore.”

Verdammt! I was right.

I kept hoping I was wrong. But when the expected did, after all, happen, I have to say, I got teary. I liked Dumbledore better than I ever did Harry.

She’s a good writer. But still . . . J K Rowling sucks.

8 thoughts on “J K Rowling Sucks

  1. Have some faith, man! Wait till you see how it turns out in the end before saying she sucks. My favorite movie in the Star Wars trilogy is The Empire Strikes Back, but only because Return of the Jedi ties up the loose ends. Don’t forget that we only have part of the story. 🙂

  2. The Death of the D-man ties in nicely with Granger’s Alchemy theory. But, alchemy will also mean that all the romantic notions of some kind of Return to life for any of the dead folks just ain’t going to happen.

    Also the Dumbledore/Gandalf comparison holds true too: he had to dies somewhere.

  3. Exactly!! I was pretty sure it was coming, and I was still mad! When I finished the book, I handed it to Luke (we were sharing a copy), and still teary, said “take it. i hate it.” Of course, I already can’t wait for the next one. Such a dilemma!

  4. I don’t get this crying thing. I’m just not as attached to these characters as some folks are.

    The book was about as moving as a people mover at Bush Intercontinental in Houston. Nothing really bad about it, but there was no emotion in it at all.

  5. Huw:

    Yes, well, it just goes to show your emtional impenetrability, your aloofness from human pain and struggle.

    We can’t help it if we can open up and be vulnerable to . . . er . . . fictional characters . . .

    Oh, never mind.

    😉

  6. Hey, you don’t know me, but I came across your blog this morning, and being an avid Harry fan I had to check it out! Yeah, I was sad myself finding out that it was Dumbledore, I almost cried reading the funeral part. I’m with Susie though, it was bittersweet but I can’t wait for the next one. What to read until then….sigh.

  7. Hey Clifton!

    Yeah, I was pretty sad at Dumbledore going, too. I had heard from someone that a major character dies, and I thought of Dumbledore immediately — although I hoped it would be Snape or someone, the narrative logic just seemed to point to the D-man, what with Harry growing up and all. And it seems doubtful that there will be any return from the grave (a la either Gandalf or Obi-Wan), given what was said after Sirius’ death.

    But this morning I was thinking about this, and I found myself wondering whether Dumbledore might not have some more lessons to teach Harry after all. For example, it is still not fully resolved whether or not Dumbledore was justified in trusting Snape. His last words to Snape: “Severus…Severus, please.” were not a pleading for Snape to refrain from killing him. Is there a way that Dumbledore’s death, while final, may also contribute to the final downfall of Voldemort and the life of Harry and many others? (Apart from the obvious lack of a resurrection and the divinity involved, this would be not unlike the sacrifice of Christ.)

    Might Snape still be a double agent for the Order of the Phoenix, rather than a double agent for the Death Eaters and Voldemort? This isn’t resolved in my mind yet.

    I suppose that Dumbledore might at least teach Harry the value of love and the reality of death, neither of which Voldemort can grasp.

    And I have found a tension between the way Snape is presented by the narrator and the way that Harry perceives him, which seems to indicate that there still might be more to Snape than Harry sees. (Snape as a Judas, though, seems a rich allusion.)

    Finally, I agree with RobU that we need to wait for the narrative eschaton to realize the character of the whole (an Aristotleian point, that).

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